The Last Election by Yang Andrew & Marche Stephen

Author:Yang, Andrew & Marche, Stephen [Yang, Andrew & Marche, Stephen]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Politics, Thriller, Fiction
ISBN: 9781636141503
Google: dXeTzwEACAAJ
Amazon: 1636141501
Goodreads: 123454609
Publisher: Akashic Books
Published: 2023-09-05T04:00:00+00:00

* * *

10:22 a.m., 360 Clinton Avenue, Brooklyn, NY

The tip line is all conspiracy theories in the lead-up to Super Tuesday. The Colorado billionaire has accumulated a string of sexual assault allegations, one from a waitress in Dubuque, another from a hairdresser in Chicago.

There are at least a dozen notes describing the assault in Dubuque, but they use the same language in various places, so it’s probably an organized campaign. Still, Martha forwards the notes to the investigations team, with a message pointing out the similar language.

The Black female Democrat is a secret member of the Illuminati and has been involved in making matzah with children’s blood—a few dozen astroturfers have sent lengthy disquisitions outlining their uncovering of this ritualistic practice. These messages could only ever be of interest to scholars of blood libel. The New York Times has no scholar of blood libel on staff.

The pleasant Midwestern candidate has, according to several sources, been involved with high-level negotiations with an alien lizard race to exchange planetary sovereignty for technological development. A woman who writes the tip line at least once a week even uploaded a contract, complete with alien script and English and Chinese translations. It’s shiver-inducing. Martha doesn’t think too much about the psychology of the conspiracists. The insanity is so general that the paranoid style is banal by this point. But the alien contract is new in its detail of expression, and she sends it around to a few friends for a laugh.

One of the friends to whom Martha forwards the alien contract is Melissa McClung, recently promoted to executive editor, who calls her right away. Melissa used to be on the disinformation beat, so Martha knew she would find the contract at least half-amusing.

“What will your role in our new transplanetary order be, Melissa?” Martha asks.

“Sorry, what?”

“When the alien overlords come for the earth, what are your plans? You saw that fake contract I sent you from the tip line about how the Democrats have made deals with alien invaders?”

“Sorry, Martha, I didn’t.”

“Oh, that’s embarrassing. Well, check it out. It’s amazing.” Hold on, though. Why is Melissa reaching out if it’s not about the alien materials?

“I’m actually calling for something else,” Melissa says. “Malcolm asked me to talk to you about these audio clips from high sources.”

“Okay.” The sudden tingle of imminent defeat flutters up Martha’s back. It must be what a gambler feels when he starts to see he’s about to lose more than he can afford. Melissa wouldn’t be calling if it was a yes.

“So, it’s a pass,” Melissa says. “I know that’s not the answer you’re looking for.”

“How can it be a pass?” Martha asks, laughing at the absurdity.

“Look, these are Malcolm’s reasons, not mine, but basically he doesn’t like the anonymity of the source.”

“Deep Throat was an anonymous source. The Pentagon Papers came in anonymously.”

“I know that. You know that. Malcolm knows that. But the feeling at the top is that this just isn’t the right time.”

“What does that mean?”

“I’m just telling you what Malcolm said.

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